


Azure

by meener



Category: Horizon: Zero Dawn (Video Game)
Genre: Angst and Romance, F/M, Game Spoilers, Get Together, One Shot, Self-Discovery, what if aloy had a pet strider
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-15
Updated: 2018-10-15
Packaged: 2019-08-02 15:06:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16307474
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meener/pseuds/meener
Summary: After defeating Hades, Aloy says her goodbyes and sets out to find the body of Elisabet Sobeck. It's a long, lonely journey, and she finds herself talking to her strider along the way. She confides her thoughts and feelings, finally accepting that maybe she does want to hear the ever-present question in Erend's eyes.





	Azure

**Author's Note:**

> Hope this at least entertains a few people. One of the many reasons I loved this game was because Aloy was such a strong character who wasn't constantly sexualized. I loved her friendship with Erend, and how after their first meeting he toned down his creepiness and became a really great supporting character. I've read most of the Erend/Aloy fics on AO3 now and got this silly idea after starting a new playthrough of the game. The rating I chose might be overly cautious, but better that than underly cautious I think?

After the battle at the spire, once the world was saved and Hades defeated, Aloy quietly slipped out of Meridian and stayed away for nearly five months. She said farewell to Avad before leaving and even took the time to seek out Erend to say goodbye.  
“I have to do something,” she said, that familiar determination in the set of her jaw. “I won’t be able to rest until I go. There’s one more thing I need to take care of, before I can move on.”  
“Is this about the ancients?” Erend asked casually, desperately curious but not wanting to push. Aloy was never forthcoming with information, so used to being alone that it didn’t occur to her to share. She would mention the complicated problems she’d untangled as an afterthought, surprised when Erend was incredulous that she was _only then_ telling him that she was created by an artificial person (who was created by the ancients) to stop the extinction of life worldwide. 

She shook her head, chewing on her bottom lip thoughtfully.  
“Not exactly. Elisabet Sobeck… the woman who created Zero Dawn. She tried to go home, before she died. I need to find her, and close this loop.”  
“She’s not your mother, but she kind of is, isn’t she,” Erend murmured, resting a hand gently on Aloy’s shoulder. She rewarded him with a small smile, and his heart lurched in his chest. _She’s leaving again, and you can’t follow. Meridian is broken and the Sun King needs you. Even if you could go, she wouldn’t want you along for the ride._

“Be safe, Aloy,” Erend rumbled, pulling his hand back regretfully. “Stop by after you find her. I’m sure we’ll be in some kind of peril by the time you get back, and I’ve kinda come to rely on you bailing me out.”  
Aloy rolled her eyes and shook her head, amused but unwilling to give him the satisfaction of her laughter.  
“I’m sure I’ll be back in this direction eventually. I don’t belong in the sacred land, especially without Rost. Besides, with Hades defeated, I might be able to resurrect Gaia and see if anything is left of Apollo.”  
Erend blinked, suddenly out of his depth. “Resurrect who now? What’s an Apollo?”

Aloy did laugh then, hard enough that she clutched her stomach and said “ow” at the end. “Thanks Erend… I needed that. I’ll have to explain later, it’s...uh...complicated.”  
“Glad to help,” Erend grumbled, used to being the comic relief but rather hoping to step out of that role when it came to Aloy. “When do you leave?”  
“Now, I think. I’ve spoken with Avad and now you, so… nobody else really needs to know that I’m going.”  
The urge to preen was overwhelming, but Erend quashed it immediately. _She didn’t mean anything by it, you lughead. Stop reading into everything she says._

Still, something felt off about this goodbye. For once, she wasn’t riding out on an urgent, time-sensitive mission. While finding Elisabet was certainly important to her, the woman had been dead for hundreds of years. Time-sensitive, this definitely wasn’t. Their goodbye was hanging awkwardly, missing some word, some gesture to make it complete. Aloy lingered as well, opening her mouth and then shutting it abruptly, fanning the flames of his most secret hopes. She looked uncharacteristically vulnerable, and Erend wanted to cover her in the best armour he could find to keep her safe. She would never consent to it, though; she hated the way metal weighed her down. 

“Well, I’ll see you around,” Aloy mumbled. Erend had been silent too long, staring too much, and her cheeks were faintly pink as she began to turn away. Instinctively, he pulled off his yellow scarf and draped it around her neck. She froze momentarily before raising her hands to touch the fabric, questioning eyes finding his own.  
“Now you have to come back,” he joked, feeling strangely naked. “I’m gonna miss that scarf a lot, and I want it back here in one piece, y’know?”  
There was a long pause before Aloy smiled again, bigger than he’d seen her smile since… well, maybe ever.  
“I promise,” she said quietly, tucking the scarf more securely around her neck and walking away. He watched her go until the crowd swallowed her up, flame-bright hair and yellow scarf like a beacon. 

*****

When Aloy happened upon a small herd of striders on her first day of travel, she immediately ducked into the tall grass beside the road and went about the business of overriding one of them. While she could override any machine she came across, striders held a special place in her heart: the first machine she’d ever overridden had been a strider, and many had served her faithfully since then. A strider would suit her perfectly. 

Riding a machine put miles between herself and Meridian quickly, something that should have made her happy but instead just made her confused. She wanted, needed, to find Elisabet. Her focus had recovered enough data to give her a rough idea of where to look, and it wasn’t exactly close by. She would be traveling a long time, and she was already lonely.  
_I spent my entire life as an outcast. So much has happened since the proving… I met so many people. I never thought I’d need anyone, but somehow, I’ve changed._ As though it sensed her distraction, the strider slowed to a trot.  
“At least I have you,” Aloy murmured, running a hand over the mane-like blue cords that lit up the quickly darkening world around her. Bringing the machine to a halt, Aloy swung down and led the strider away from the road towards a clump of trees. Her legs and rear end were sore from riding, and all she wanted was to curl up on her bedroll and breathe in the scent of Erend’s scarf. 

Instead, she made a fire and ate some of the food she’d packed for the road. The strider grazed nearby, its quiet mechanical hum keeping her company. Once she was full and the sky was dark and full of stars, she finally set up her bedroll and blanket. With bow and spear within grabbing distance, she settled down and gathered the soft yellow scarf under her chin. It smelled like his soap and armor, a mix of citrus and the polish he used on his weapons. Underneath that was the smell of him, the slightly woodsy scent of his skin. It was the perfect blend of sweat and musk that filled Aloy’s heart with longing. Pressing it against her cheek, she let out a shuddering breath. This scent was going to fade eventually, and she wouldn’t get to smell it again for a very long time. 

“Oh Aloy,” she scolded herself quietly. “How could you let this happen?” The strider raised its head as though listening to her, and she smiled sadly.  
“I guess you need a name of your own, so you’ll know when I’m talking to you. Not that you _can_ know anything like that. Still… I’ll call you Azure.”

She fell asleep wondering about the information processing abilities of simple machines like striders, and almost forgot to be lonely. 

*****

The next morning she was on the road just after dawn. Azure galloped beneath her steadily and she found herself talking to the machine, essentially thinking-out-loud.  
“I guess we’re in the same boat,” she mused. “I came along out of nowhere and changed you. This time yesterday you were with your pack, together but separate. Eating grass and making blaze. Now you’re reprogrammed, traveling with me to find Elisabet Sobeck. If she even made it home, that is.”  
Aloy paused her monologue to adjust her pack and bow against her back, urging Azure onwards with her knees.  
“The same thing happened to me, only not as fast. I was finally in Mother’s heart, making my way to the blessing. I stopped because of the Sun Priest getting pelted with tomatoes, but I stayed because of Erend. He was so charismatic, so different from the Nora. When he spoke to me, I assumed it was because of Olin. He wouldn’t have noticed me, if I hadn’t been talking to his friend. But then I came to Meridian and he said my name like… like he was seeing a ghost. He remembered me, he cared that I survived. Sure, he was drunker than I’ve ever seen anyone in my life but… it was real.”

She lapsed into silence, savouring the memory of her reunion with Erend. Time and familiarity had softened her disgust at his drunkenness, and now she only felt pride that he had overcome his dependence on ale to get him through a hard time. Azure suddenly came to a halt, making a warning sound. Aloy turned on her focus and found the cause of the problem: scrappers, just over the crest of the hill. 

“Good girl,” she murmured, dismounting silently and slipping into a patch of grass. “I’ll take care of them and we’ll be on our way in no time.”

*****

As much as Aloy wanted to finish her journey, things inevitably got in the way. Machines that needed avoiding caused the most delays, but second after that was people needing her help. She found herself seeking out lost family members, tracking down bandit thieves and hunting machines that were terrorizing small villages along her path. Days and weeks were sunk into these pursuits, and the only constant through it all was Azure. 

The strider was as silent and docile as any other strider she’d ever used, but this time she was getting attached. She began to attribute thoughts and emotions to the machine: When it lifted its head and looked in her direction it was inquisitive, or incredulous. When it stood near her campsite at night and grazed, she felt as though the strider was watching over her. 

Intellectually, she knew it was ridiculous. Striders didn’t care, they only did what they were programmed to do. But alone on the road, spending days without seeing another human being, she felt justified in talking to the machine. _Where’s the harm in talking? Azure can’t tell anyone my secrets, and I think it helps me to say what’s on my mind for once._ This was the first time she’d kept an overridden machine for more than two days, and after four weeks of travel she was certain she’d be able to pick Azure out of a herd without any trouble. 

There was a scratch on her flank that curved up over a metal plate on her neck, and a small cluster of lights on her face that didn’t light up the way they should. Aloy wove some luminous braiding into the cords of her mane, amusing herself one rainy afternoon while they sheltered in the rusted shell of an ancient ruin. 

“When I left Meridian, I didn’t understand myself. I was afraid to go see Erend. I was afraid I’d look into his eyes and I wouldn’t be able to go,” Aloy chatted away to Azure, crouching in the dirt to skin a rabbit she’d caught for dinner. “He made it easy on me though… I think he could tell I was struggling. I’ve seen it in his eyes a few times, this hesitation. He wants to tell me something, but he never does. Until that day, I was always relieved that he couldn’t find the words. I didn’t know if I wanted to hear them. Now that Hades is gone and the threat of immediate catastrophe is over, though… I kind of wish he would have told me.”

Rabbit skinned and spitted, Aloy set about starting a fire. Azure seemed to realize the conversation was over and took a few steps away to graze, never far away from her unlikely friend. 

*****

The day that Aloy found Elisabet, she didn’t cry. She’d known the roboticist was dead all along, dead for hundreds of years. Instead of crying she dug a grave and buried her not-mother, building a small monument out of ridgewood and machine lenses that caught the light and cast colourful shadows. 

She spent several hours there, wandering around the old house and gazing out over the surrounding fields. She listened to recordings of Elisabet’s journals, silently thanking the woman to whom she owed her life. _Without you, none of this would exist. No grass, no trees. The Nora would never have been born, and neither would the Banuk, Carja or Oseram. Erend wouldn’t be waiting for me in Meridian right now. I wouldn’t know what it feels like, to have someone I care about waiting to see me again._

Tucking the colourful bauble she taken from Elisabet’s hand into her travel pack, Aloy climbed onto Azure’s back and took a last look at the final resting place of Alpha Prime.  
“Goodbye, Elisabet,” she sighed, turning back towards home. “I’ve served your purpose. I’m sure I’ll continue to do so, but… for a little while, I need to serve my own.”

*****

The journey back always feels quicker than the journey to a destination. Aloy made fewer stops, encountered fewer people looking for help, and had a better idea of where to avoid the most dangerous machines. She knew exactly where she was going, and intended to get there as quickly as possible. She made excellent time, and the closer she got to Meridian, the more her spirits lifted. 

Certainly, there were times that her stomach felt tied into knots. She had spent so much time talking to Azure about her feelings for Erend, she was no longer certain he reciprocated what she was now almost certain was love. The thought of seeing his pale blue eyes again, the way he smiled when he spotted her weaving through the crowd, made her almost dizzy. Whether he loved her or not, she knew she had to see him. She had to find out if she was right about what he meant when he gave her his scarf. 

Aloy was so distracted by her thoughts that she didn’t notice the storm bird overhead until it was too late. It attacked suddenly, throwing her from Azure’s back. She fell roughly to the ground, barely able to roll onto her feet and begin shooting at the massive machine overhead. She fought savagely, firing arrow after arrow and ducking behind whatever cover she could find. When the storm bird swooped down low Azure attacked, a futile attempt to subdue the enemy. The storm bird lashed out with its tail, dealing serious damage to the strider’s back legs. Unable to stand, Azure was powerless to escape from the storm bird attacking with beak and talons. 

Releasing a harrowing battle cry, Aloy ran at the storm bird and fired a succession of tearblast arrows, taking out three of the engines on the machines massive wings. Her heart was racing in a way that it hadn’t in ages, her usual calculating approach to fighting abandoned in favour of blind rage. It was over in minutes, but it felt like hours. The storm bird lay crackling with electricity in a broken heap. Aloy paused only to drink a tincture of shockwax root before stumbling to the spot where Azure had fallen.

The strider was still and silent. Her lights were out, the quiet hum of her life extinguished. Aloy ran shaking hands over her body, horrified by the bile rising up in her throat. _Just a machine, Aloy, get it together. She was… IT was just a machine. Stupid mistake, naming a strider, pretending it was your friend. It’s no different than the storm bird you just destroyed - metal and wire._

Despite the litany of words running through her mind, she wasn’t calm. Azure was dead, and her eyes were burning. Usually a downed machine meant Aloy was happily harvesting valuable parts, but this time, she couldn’t bring herself to do it. The only thing she did was unwind the luminous braiding from the strider’s neck, tying the strands clumsily around her own wrist like a set of bracelets. Choking back a sob, she turned and ran.

*****

Erend was puttering around his kitchen, ready to enjoy a hard-earned day of rest. His second in command was in charge today, leaving him to do as he pleased. Having slept in well past his usual pre-dawn wakeup time, Erend was brewing a pot of strong tea and considering a trip up to the spire. He liked going there in his free time and looking out over the city. It was easier to pretend she was beside him up there, looking out across the maizelands. 

Repairs were still underway, but the city was well on its way to becoming normal. All the machines and rubble had been cleared and most of the dwellings were habitable again. The Vanguard had been working extra shifts, assisting with reconstruction whenever possible. All the men were tired, and nobody more so than Erend. He yawned, stretching out both arms and twisting his shoulders from side to side. 

There was a firm knock on his door, and he growled. _Which idiot didn’t get the memo that this is my first day off in two weeks?!_ Setting his mug down on the counter hard, he stomped over to the door of his apartment and swung it inwards aggressively. Aloy stood in front of him, pale and shaking. Her eyes were red-rimmed and puffy, and his scarf was clutched in her hands.  
“Aloy,” he breathed, all anger forgotten. “What happened? Come inside, please, come sit down. You look terrible.”  
It was a testament to how awful she felt that she made no sarcastic remark when he said she looked terrible. Aloy allowed him to guide her to sofa, dropping her weapons and travel pack on the floor as she walked. She sat heavily and immediately her head was in her hands.  
“Erend,” she said thickly, voice heavy with emotion. “It’s so good to see you.”  
“Really?” he asked, uncertain how to take those words said in that tone. “Shit Aloy, I’m happy to see you too, but what the hell is going on? Just… tell me who to kill, and I’ll go do it. I swear, whoever upset you like this will answer to my hammer.”

Aloy raised her head from her hands and gave him a watery smile. “I already killed it. Storm bird. Ripped out its heart and everything.”  
Erend deflated. Kicking the ass of whoever, or whatever, had upset Aloy was his only plan of action. She saved him from having to say anything else by carefully folding up his travel-worn scarf and placing it gently onto his knee, next to her own.  
“Here’s your scarf back, mostly in one piece. Maybe not quite the same as you saw it last, but… you still want it, don’t you?”  
She looked directly into his eyes with her own bloodshot hazel, practically holding her breath for his answer. Erend, not quite understanding the significance, somehow stumbled into the right answer anyway.  
“I couldn’t care less about that rag. All I care is that you’re back, and you’re okay. I fucking _missed you_ , Aloy.”

Whatever restraint had been holding her together snapped when she heard those words. Tears ran down her face and she threw herself against his chest, both hands clutching onto one of his own. Erend put his free arm around her and rested his chin atop her head, uncertain if it was all right to be pleased with the sudden development. Aloy was _crying_ , quietly, but it was still the most emotion he had ever seen her display since the day they’d met. After being a witness to all of her strength, he wasn’t sure how to handle her stark grief. 

“I’m sorry,” she sniffled, releasing his hand and beginning to draw back. Erend wound both arms around her then, keeping her close.  
“No way. You’re not allowed to be sorry. Just tell me what’s wrong, please. This can’t all be over a storm bird.”  
Aloy relaxed against him and he felt her shrug.  
“No, not really. It’s not about any one thing. The storm bird just…. Opened the door, I guess.” she fell silent for a long minute and Erend waited patiently, rubbing gentle patterns across her back.  
“When I left Meridian, I came across a pack of striders. Lucky break, finding a ride so quickly. I overrode one and we were off, making pretty good time when we weren’t interrupted.”  
“Interrupted?” Erend asked, not sensing the irony of his question until after it slipped out.  
“There were so many people affected by the Eclipse and corruption along the way. I kept stopping to help, but it set me back. Then there were the machines. I didn’t want to fight them all, so I had to lead Azure around a lot of them.”  
“Who’s Azure?” he asked, vaguely jealous that she might have allowed someone else on her journey when she hadn’t invited him. Aloy squirmed a little and sighed.  
“So embarrassing… Azure was the strider. After keeping the same machine with me for a few days, I named it. It was so _convenient_ having her with me, I didn’t want to have to find a new ride. So I named the one I had and was extra careful to make sure she wasn’t destroyed by anything we encountered along the way.”

Aloy paused to cough and Erend remembered his tea on the kitchen counter, probably bitter from steeping so long. He carefully disentangled himself from Aloy and collected two cups of tea, trying not to laugh when he noticed her surreptitiously wiping her face with his scarf. Returning to her side, he put a cup of tea into her hands and sat close enough that their knee and shoulder were touching. Aloy sipped the tea and smiled gratefully. 

“I got a little lonely, the further away I traveled. I stopped meeting people, and there were entire days where Azure was the only machine in sight. So I started talking to her. It was silly at first, an excuse to speak my thoughts out loud. I talked to her about Elisabet and Rost, the Nora, even you.”  
“What did you tell her about me,” Erend couldn’t resist asking, smiling cheekily and raising one eyebrow. Aloy snorted and ignored his question.  
“Being raised an outcast, I used to thrive on silence and being alone. I always had Rost to go home to, though. I never realized until I was truly alone how much that meant.”  
_You’ll never be alone again, as long as you let me stay with you_ , he wanted to tell her, but sipped his tea instead. He could see her struggling to get the words out, now, and didn’t want to make it any harder for her.  
“I got used to people. After the proving, I met so many new people, and they _spoke to me_. I guess I got used to the feeling of being a part of society, part of something bigger than myself that wasn’t Zero Dawn. I started talking to my strider out of loneliness, and then I got attached. I know that machines don’t think or feel but sometimes, it really felt like Azure had a personality. It was all in my head, but it still helped.”  
“I think I know where this is going,” Erend murmured.  
“Yes… two days ago the storm bird attacked. I was distracted, too excited about Meridian on the horizon. I didn’t see it until it was on top of us. Azure was destroyed, and all the emotions I was holding inside through this entire nightmare came right to the surface. I was so furious, and so sad. I cried for hours while I walked, it’s lucky I didn’t attract any more hostile machines.”

Erend set his cup on the low table by his couch and opened his arms expectantly. Aloy drained her cup and practically threw it onto the table before leaning against his chest, her own arms sneaking around his waist.  
“I felt so foolish coming here, crying over a strider. I’ve killed dozens of striders in my life and never gave it a second thought. I was crying for Azure, but I think a lot of my tears were for Rost and everyone else at the proving. I buried Elisabet, and now that it’s over I miss her. After all the months I spent tracking the Eclipse and trying to stop Hades, Azure forced me to finally mourn my losses.”  
“You’re only human, Aloy. You’ve been through hell and back again. It would be weirder if you _hadn’t_ cried over your pet strider.”

Aloy leaned back, eyes roaming across Erend’s face thoughtfully. Her frank gaze caught him off guard and he felt a blush creeping up his neck.  
“I feel better now,” she said simply. “I needed Azure on that trip, but now I’m talking to you.” Erend felt a rush of joy at her words, suddenly very aware of how close her body was to his. It made him dizzy, and he couldn’t stop his eyes from dropping to her lips suggestively. Her breathing was shallow, her cheeks flushed. A slow smile was curling her lips. _All signs point to YES_ , he told himself.  
“I never expected to be so glad to replace a strider as your confidante,” he sighed.  
“Shut up Erend,” she replied, pressing her mouth to his. Her lips were slightly chapped and she tasted of bitter tea, but it was the best kiss he’d ever received in his life. 

She pulled back a moment later, blushing and uncertain. Erend followed, kissing her with all the pent up passion he’d been suppressing since the day they’d met in Mother’s Heart. She melted against him, clinging to his shirt and groaning quietly when his tongue brushed against her own. He kissed her like he’d wanted to at the battle of the spire, hot and desperate. Aloy pushed him back against the couch and he reigned himself in, afraid that he’d gone too far. Instead of being upset, she straddled his lap and grabbed his face, kissing him like he was the only thing she ever wanted for herself. It was a little rough and unpracticed, but it set him on fire. 

Knowing that Aloy was exhausted and emotional, Erend carefully slowed the kiss to something sweet and gentle. He highly doubted she intended for this encounter to escalate to the bedroom, which is where his eager body was starting to anticipate they were headed. She pulled back just far enough to press her forehead against his, panting.  
“You do love me,” she stated quietly.  
Erend let out a surprised laugh.  
“You know, anointed one, people usually say ‘I love you’ to each other instead of what you just said to me.”  
“I love you, too” she replied, grinning. “But don’t call me that or I’ll go find another strider to talk to instead of you.”


End file.
